Step 2 Kindness/Personal Transformation

Be kind to people whether they deserve your kindness or not. If your kindness reaches the deserving, good for you; if your kindness reaches the undeserving, take joy in your compassion.
— James Fadiman and Robert Frager in Essential Sufism


Kindness

Enhances:
Generosity

Balances/Counters:
Selfishness

The spiritual practice of kindness encompasses a range of small acts and habits that we know as old-fashioned good manners — saying "please" and "thank you," waiting your turn, lending a helping hand, or cheering someone up with a smile. It applies not just to your relationships with other people. Etiquette in the spiritual life extends to things, animals, plants, and the Earth.

This practice also means being generous with your presence, your time, and your money. Give freely without expecting anything in return. Just do it. Kindness is not a quid pro quo endeavor.

I wouldn’t describe myself as unkind, cruel, or nasty, but I would have to admit that I often miss the mark on this spiritual practice. I have to remember the many times I have been hurt by someone not doing something — the call that didn't come when I was feeling low, the thank you note that never appeared, the missed appointment — but then I have to consider how often I have neglected to act in similar circumstances. Kindness is very susceptible to the sin of omission.

Still, acknowledging that I have missed another's kindness has made me more aware that I want to be kind more consistently. This is one of those situations when a negative experience has a positive outcome.